09. Rose Red (2002, Craig R Baxley)
By Eivind Langdal
24th September 2009

Haunted mansions really do make good horror locations, don’t they? Sure, they’ve had their fair share of visitors over the years, but they work so well that it’s no wonder writers come back to them, again and again (or maybe I’m just saying that because I am certain one of the buildings at my school is haunted). Rose Red, the TV mini-series based on Stephen King’s novel, is a good example of why, even though it’s a seriously flawed creation. Like IT (another Stephen King creation reviewed in this feature), it tries to use the lesser constraints of TV to create a larger and more flowing narrative. However, whereas IT benefited from its long running time, Rose Red is simply too much of… well, everything. There is nothing here that makes any solid evidence that this thing couldn’t have been a 2-hour movie.

Nevertheless, Rose Red is worth seeing because it is just so damn scary. I literally screamed at the screen at one point when watching this film, and I watched parts of it halfway behind my black hooded sweater. Here, I think I have stumbled on why this thing is so damn hard to review: when it’s really going, it’s as good as horror can be, but at its lowest, it simply won’t do. Which one prevails? What is the ultimate decider? The premise of the series, which sees a science professor named Joyce Reardon gather a group of people with various psychical skills to make a trip to the haunted Rose Red mansion, is intriguing in its silliness, but once the gang makes it to their targeted destination, a large string of detours and a whole lot of nothing come dangerously close to bringing the film down. Once it’s finished, you have to wonder why the story needed to be over 4 hours long.

I won’t go into detail about all members of the psychic crew, except from one, the most important: the young Annie, who has the ability to control much of the physical world with her mind. Prof. Reardon figures her for the most important person of her crew, and indeed, once they make it to Rose Red, Annie soon comes in contact with a few spirits that may provide some intriguing information. The rest of the crew encounters a few otherworldly creatures themselves, though they are less friendly than the ones Annie gets acquainted with. Of course, by “less friendly”, I mean that they are a group of seriously ghosts that might make your hair go white. If it’s already white, it’ll probably go purple or something. Or… oh, never mind.

However, while the scary parts work, Rose Red doesn’t even come close to working in the moments in-between. The acting is seriously sub par at times, though much of it is so because the script is so damn ridiculous. In addition to all of this, Rose Red lacks dramatic drive, and often creeps forward at a snail-like pace without ever hinting at some kind of destination for the story to arrive in.

However, Rose Red has a trump card: its haunted mansion. We are told its story in flashback throughout the series, and learn that it once belonged to the Rhinbaumer family, who spent a large number of years building it without ever finishing the job. It is said to have had a life of on its own, and we learn that it claimed the life of many a construction worker by what seemed to be accidents but actually was the house acting out its power. Now, some of you back there might think this is a bit silly, but the idea of the house being alive is actually intriguing, much because it makes the idea of exploring it so much difficult, as it has the ability to redecorate itself at will. Imagine trying to find your way in a house that is not only ridiculously large, but which will make it harder to find out where you came from because where you came from is no longer there.

There are a large number of scary scenes in this series that builds on this premise with great skill, as the crew members get lost even when they think they actually have an idea of where they are. It is one thing to leave stones in your trail to find your way home; it is another to for the trail to disappear completely.

Ultimately, it is actually quite hard what to make of Rose Red. The house itself is a fine creation, both in how it looks and how it acts. The set design is truly spectacular, and as the crew explore their weekend resort home and discover dark flower gardens, hallways where the roof is the floor and the floor is the roof, and libraries where the floor is one big mirror, once can’t help but realize that someone really did their job on this film. The problem is: some other people didn’t. Rose Red could really have been something. Occasionally, it comes close to making some solid points about several themes, be it obsession, madness or curses, but ultimately it works better as a pulp story, thanks to its great ability to… well, how should I put this… scare the living crap of its audience.

This was actually time number 1 1/2 that I saw this series. When I first saw it, I was too scared to finish it. When I saw it again, I finished it, but I was still scared. Very scared.